Obligations

Our actions are driven by obligation. We looked a little bit at one kind of preference; obligations concerning utility. Obligations can be complex since there are always factors involved. To have good character we should pay our bills before helping a friend. It makes sense to keep our household first but if the friend is in trouble an exception might be made. Parents and children should help each other first but that has conditions too; we don't want either to be abused. There are some we give preference in everything and others we might do a favor for. Of course the details influence how far we go.

When it comes to honor, there are different types; one for leaders, those who protect us, fathers and mothers and those who are older than us. We should give the appropriate honor to those who are due. A lack of discretion in this area shows poor character. But when is it appropriate to limit a relationship?

It is easy to see that business friendships discontinue either when the business has ended or one has been ripped off. A pleasure relationship ends when the expectation of pleasure ends. Falling short in these kind of relationships is obvious and the resulting separation expected. Should we cut off a relationship based in goodness when one person goes bad? What if one has a deep relationship based on commonalities and goodness but one person goes bad? It doesn't make sense for both to become bad to make it right since badness denotes unfaithfulness and self destructive actions and love cannot be based in those sort of things. A person can go bad for many reasons so with a deep relationship the good one might stick it out knowing the person's heart. They might come to their assistance to help or hope for rehabilitation of some kind. No one would expect an obligation like this nor would there be any blame if they cut it off. It is the characteristic of a caring person to help but with everything there are limitations.  They should support each other in goodness toward themselves and others.

Old friends and acquaintances may get cut off by time or a change in fortune but we always have a fondness toward them that we wouldn't have toward a stranger. Our tastes change with time and sometimes that is a factor also. Good character isn't a matter of taste and so it is one area that is stable. Paybacks are self destructive and so we owe no one anything but to love them.