Boundaries

We established that friendships are rewarding as long as there is a mutual understanding. Concerning goods and services, the price should be the same regardless of a person's background. This allows economic exchanges with the decisions made by the buyers and sellers.  We have currency to make it easy for everyone to set the values. When friendships add third parties to regulate, it results in complications and hostilities since the third party will naturally want to profit but can force everyone to follow his judgment. This eliminates friendly exchange between people. Someone who rips another off can normally be cut off while those who treat others well will prosper. It is best left up to the free choice of the participants rather than a bureaucrat.

When other kinds of friendships are involved, we bend the rules of equality. A father should get a good deal from his son but there are limits to this. Of course a son can't be expected to give everything away or vice versa. When we have close friends and people that we want to help out, we should feel free to do so without compulsion. This has it's limits too since a prodigal tries to please everyone but doesn't take care of himself therefore losing everything.

In our personal relationships, we also have preferences and rightly so. When we invite people to a wedding; it is usually the relatives preferred over acquaintances. So in our personal lives, there will always be preferences shown. But when it comes to business with the public, fairness is expected and it is considered wrong to give preference to family and friends. These principles all have particulars and finding the right rule depends on what the business is. A corporation will be more stringent than a mechanic who has his own shop but helping others always has limitations and fairness. We shouldn't fret about setting boundaries but do our best to set and obey proper ones.

The questions arises as to whether there is anything wrong with cutting off a friend who doesn't live up to expectations. Duplicity in a friendship is similar to using counterfeit money to purchase something. It is natural for a person to be angered if the other wasn't being honest. We will look into details in the next post.