Selfie

Without self interest we couldn't have personalities. But at the same time, self interest is where most of our conflicts occur. In governing, some want their causes supported and everyone else to pay for them. So we have the conflict between the private and public good. That is a study in itself. It is how we govern our self interests that gives us good character. It isn't always a denial but unlimited self interest is where we get the word self indulgent. Of course the amount of passion we have drives them. The utility kind of friendship is also based in self interest.

Nowhere is there a better illustration of self interest than driving in traffic. I am terrible when it comes to lights. My anxiety level is raised by traffic lights since I am a passionate person that likes movement. Nothing worse than sitting at a red light for hours when there is no other traffic. Well maybe its seconds (forty seconds is a long light!) but I did calculate how many seconds a year and how many hours of my life will be spent at a certain unnecessary light in my home town. The passenger said it was a little crazy that I calculated while I fussed. But in order for the roads to remain safe, we must obey traffic lights.

It would be nice if everyone in the world just let us through like the President, but since we are all equals (darn it!) we all have to wait our turn. So everyone that arrives at a light has self interest and wants to go right through but we know that in the name of safe traffic flow it isn't possible. We must go when it is our turn. The traffic laws are utility based. Nothing is more annoying than that person who wants to be liked who messes up the whole flow by letting a person through at the expense of everyone else's turn. Stand offs at stop signs are an example of this. Self interest is a reality and is good and those who claim to deny it are usually out for something else for themselves such as a favor or to be liked. Traffic is a utility relationship and not a love relationship and so getting these crossed causes problems. A green light means go even if you want to allow someone else the courtesy of driving through.

Who doesn't get the phone call that we think is a friend who cares only to find out they want something from us. It could be to borrow a tool or a useful thing or it could be to go overboard in a relationship for pleasure. We can be disappointed when we think it is a concern call and it ends up being utility. Utility isn't bad though since we need help ourselves sometimes and it is good to have people to call on. I remember pouring cement and was told to ask for a lot of help since few actually showed. What a pleasant surprise when I had at least ten people showed up! Every person was there. Helping each other is a good thing, having friends that are entertaining is good and having those who we share with is also good. But when it comes to helping out, we want justice where there is an equal exchange. The neighbor who always borrows but never helps out is rightfully look on as unjust. In our utility exchanges it is good to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. That really does sum it up.