Masculine verses Feminine

I've recently read a book called "The Way of a Superior Man" by David Deida. It is more of a spiritualist's view on the dynamics between men and women. Although it is a bit lewd at times and neutral as far as gender and religion go, he still makes valid points concerning masculinity and femininity. It is hard to do a book justice with a summary, but we can hit on a few points.

Anyone can show masculine and feminine traits in their lives. Those who are in the masculine role in life will crave feminine energy and vice versa. When we embrace who we are and enjoy the energy opposites give us, we become satisfied. First we need to define these roles and not be ashamed of them.

The emphasis of the book is how a man can be masculine and meet the needs of his woman. This not only allows her to feel satisfied in life, but his needs will be met in the process. When two don't get along or when changes occur in life, problems in passions usually can be traced back to a lack of embracing roles in life.

The feminine characteristics are more emotional and yet are true for the moment. To the masculine, they seem chaotic at times. She is going to test the one in the male role to his limits. But what she is after is a man who is nonplused by it. There are also cool comforting feminine traits. These comfort a man especially when he is under a lot of stress in his life.

Masculine traits that the feminine desires are decisiveness and mission. She might want a role in decisions but becomes settled when her man makes them. She might have a broad spectrum of wants and desires, but likes it when a man makes plans to satisfy them. If a woman is bitchy and unsatisfied, a man has to look at two possibilities, either he isn't fulfilling his role or she isn't the right person for him.

When a man has a stressful and chaotic life, he will gravitate toward someone with the cool comforting traits. When things are going well and he is confident, he will gravitate toward someone who has more fire and is emotional. This is why a guy might get involved with an office girl when a job is stressful and why, after life has settled, he might crave an emotional person. When a female who has fire and is emotional becomes more confident and secure, she might become comfortable with a male who is more spontaneous and free.

One point he makes is that a sexual relationship is for two committed people. The "reach a climax and die" part of sex will leave both unsatisfied without the rest of the relationship. When life changes bring us to the point of different wants, it doesn't always involve changing partners. He gives ideas on how to get the traits we desire out of the person we are with. For instance, he says that doing everything together causes our traits to dull against each other and for contrast, women should be encouraged to go out and celebrate their feminity. Males should go out with the guys and party once and a while too.

There should be no issue with enjoying and drawing energy from those who have the traits we desire. We should drink it in and enjoy it as long as it doesn't complicate our lives. He gives advice to males on how to avoid turning the good energy between opposites into sensual desire. Of course this is only a quick summary, I think this is a book that every young man should read.