We have all run into with “yes men”; those who will do
anything to get people to like them. The other extreme is someone who is contrary
and opposes everything. This person might be called contentious and could care
less about hurting those around him. There is a middle ground here: a person
who is discrete and opposes the right things the right way. We like others to
be friendly and when there is affection added, the person is a friend. Absent
passion or care for the person is simply being kind since there is no
relational value. Kindness is a state of character in this application and a
kind person will be that way towards strangers and his friends. He will lean
toward not causing pain to others yet at the same time will be honest and
discrete. A kind person will pay attention to the kind of people he is around
and will act accordingly all the while using discretion. He will choose his
fights and only speak ill when honor is at stake. Confrontation isn't the goal
and will only happen as necessary. A kind person will try as much as possible
to be a blessing to others.
We see this middle ground that belongs to people who are
pleasant to be around. One extreme belongs to the person who is a yes man.
There are two reasons for this behavior. One is that he only wants the pleasure
of being liked and the other is that he wants something out of the relationship.
The person who is kind because he wants something is a flatterer. The other extreme is completely opposite; the
contentious person who wants to argue about everything. There are various reasons
for this such as wanting to appear knowledgeable or having a bad demeanor. But
we have to agree that a person who is kind yet tactful is the one everyone likes to
hang out with.
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